


her many firsts

by Utsutsusu



Category: Kagerou Project
Genre: F/F, Unrequited Crush, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-08
Updated: 2015-07-08
Packaged: 2018-04-08 08:26:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 651
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4297650
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Utsutsusu/pseuds/Utsutsusu
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Momo Kisaragi thinks on the many firsts she's experienced since meeting the dan.</p>
            </blockquote>





	her many firsts

**Author's Note:**

> I probably haven't looked hard enough, but I have seen a fic or two about Kido having an unrequited love for Momo. Here, I thought I'd try out a what if Momo had the unrequited feelings.

For the last few years your heart has seen pain. Different shapes, different sizes, but they all hurt nonetheless. 

From the near-death experience, to the loss of your dad, your family situation only got worse after that. A mom who overworked herself to the point of waking up in a hospital, to a brother you barely see anymore, much less talk to. Maybe you could say it’s not so lonely because you have friends—but even then…that isn’t the case. You don’t have friends. Just people who loathe you, envy you. You had all the attention you could ever want, but not in the preferable form. Heck, not even the preferred was nice. It wasn’t genuine; it wasn’t through any hard work or special talent you have that truly made you stand out as a person. 

It was because of your curse. Nothing more, nothing less. 

At least, this is how your thought process went until you did make friends. Friends who understood what you’re going through and you couldn’t ask for a better group of people. The most unlikely bunch, in retrospect, but you would replace not even one of them. 

The one who seems to understand you the most is, ironically, the one with an eye ability completely opposite to your own. She doesn’t attract attention, in fact, she takes attention away from herself. She might as well be invisible. Ohhh, but she’s far from it in your eyes. 

She’s like an idol shining in her very own spotlight. 

She’s kind, thoughtful, loyal, and even funny under that rough exterior she made for herself. She’s actually even a little sensitive, at times, along with so many other positive and negative things about her…and there’s nothing you would change about that either.

Ever since making these friends you’ve experienced a lot of firsts. First big group of friends, first major hang outs, first fights with friends, first crush—

Ah.

First crush.

Yeah…

She’s so good for your heart…but not. At the same time.

She makes your heart do all sorts of dumb things…things described in those shoujo mangas your brother loves to read so much. You know? Heart beating a little faster, breath being stolen at some points, a blush that dared to appear on your face, all that cheesy jazz. 

Sure, you had some idea on how this stuff worked, from overhearing the gossip of girls going on, and on, about some cute boy; the occasional shoujo manga you would skim through, before throwing it away in favor of a shounen manga…but you would’ve never thought it could be like this? Overwhelming? Not in a bad way. Actually, it was kind of nice…? A type of happiness you could experience every so often—geez, who are you kidding? 

You aren’t going to lie to yourself. It hurts too. It really does. 

You know it for a fact that she sees you as a friend. So, you’re never going to bother with a confession. You’ll just let these feelings sit. For as long as it’ll take for them to pass. 

For every time she grabs your hand—or jump in to protect you—in a pinch, for every time she petted your head as a silly affectionate thing, for every time she’d listen to your problems, for every time she’d go along with your fun…for every time she’d call you “Kisaragi” you’d feel your heart doing flips—

You could honestly go on and on, but you won’t.

That’d only make you fall more in love and you don’t need to do that to yourself. 

She’s so good for you, but not. At the same time. 

Your heart has seen pain for the last few years and this isn’t too different.

You suppose this is just another painful thing in your life you have to endure, but at least you’re not going through it alone.

**Author's Note:**

> This was written at the dead of night, whoops.


End file.
